Lessons from Epictetus

22. Appropriate acts are in general measured by the relations they are concerned with. “He is your father.” This means you are called on to take care of him, give way to him in all things, bear with him if he reviles or strikes you.
“But he is a bad father.”
Well, have you any natural claim to a good father? No, only to a father.
“My brother wrongs me.”
Be careful then to maintain the relation you hold to him, and do not consider what he does, but what you must do if your purpose is to keep in accord with nature. For no one shall harm you, without your consent; you will only be harmed, when you think you are harmed. You will only discover what is proper to expect from neighbor, citizen, or magistrate, if you get into the habit of looking at the relations implied by each. (Epictetus "The Handbook")

Epictetus teaches a big lesson about family here in this passage from The Handbook. He teaches that according to nature, you are only guaranteed to have a father or mother. It is not guaranteed that you will have a good father or mother, or even a bad one. Just that you have been given a father or mother, naturally. This means that no matter how they are, they are your father or mother, and so you must treat them as such.

He also goes on to say retain your relation with him (or her) and don't think of if they are bad or good in your own standards, but instead accept that they are your parent according to nature.

This part is important in all aspects of life, family or not: For no one shall harm you, without your consent; you will only be harmed, when you think you are harmed. The only way you can be harmed, emotionally or mentally, is if you allow yourself to be harmed. Raging and being angry are actions that you allow yourself. Nature shouldn't make you upset because it has given you a bad father or mother. You are allowing yourself to dwell on the fact that you have a bad father or mother, and not accepting what nature has accorded you. The only person who can hurt you is yourself.

We have such short lives, so little time together, that to dwell and fester on the simplest things can just be a waste of time. So allow yourself to not become consumed by rage only caused by yourself and begin to enjoy your life for what nature has given you.

Friday Weigh In

June 5: 133.8
June 12: 131.6
June 22: 134.4
June 26: 133.2
July 3: 132.4
July 10: 134.0
July 17: 135.0
July 24: 134.4

August 7: 134.0

I think I have to accept the fact that I will be around this weight for awhile, unless I change a lot of things. But with my hypoglycemia, it makes it so difficult to not eat! I read articles about keeping snacking at a minimum. Yeah, I guess I should snack on better stuff... but what I snack on isn't THAT terrible. I eat granola bars, grapes, apple sauce, almonds, cheese and crackers, cheese sticks... I dunno what to do! I can't NOT eat. I can go maybe 3 hours at the most without some sort of food too. I've been drinking lots of water, but I don't know if that does anything either.

Anyway, I don't know how much working out I'll be doing in the next few weeks. We'll be moving next Friday, hopefully in Colorado by Saturday, and then staying there for a bit. Afterwards, we're going to Las Vegas, and then Los Angeles, before flying to Hawaii. I think we'll just be moving so much, and eating so much free food (haha) that I won't have time to watch the weight! Maybe if when I get to Hawaii I don't have a job right away, I can spend my time working out. Yeah. :)

My Weekend

Ok, I didn't do my weigh-in. We can safely say that I weigh about the same as I always have! Haha. I've had a crazy weekend so far... very busy. Lemme tell you. :)

Wednesday: So I'll start with Wednesday. I had work this day from 12 to 6, training for my new job. Brandon was at Ranger School. I was debating bringing my phone to the floor, just in case Brandon calls. But I told myself, and my little sister, "there's like a .1% chance he calls!" Soooo... I go on my break at 3:10 and I have 4 phone calls, one as recent as 3:02. I freaked out! He had been dropped from the course for failing land nav and I had to pick him up. His last call said he was getting a cab and he didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to do either! So I tell my boss I have an emergency (this is pretty much an emergency!) and drive home. I paced the apartment for an hour and a half until he came home. Well that was a relief. So now that he was home, that meant that we were moving, ASAP. That's another freak-out on its own. That night we went to dinner with friends.

Thursday: I had a doctor's appointment to be put onto Brandon's orders. Afterwards, I went to Macy's to quit my job. I felt horrible! I had just started there and now I was gone. Oh well, though, that's the life I live now. The rest of the day was fairly relaxing, except for all the planning we're starting now.

Friday: Friday I had an oil change to refute what Wal-Mart said (that they couldn't change my oil because it was leaking). Nope, no leak, perfectly fine. Stupid Wal-Mart! After I went home to hang out, and then that afternoon I volunteered at the museum. It was my last day doing that. I decided to stop then because of all the moving stuff and stress. That night we had a little barbecue with some of Brandon's friends from work. That was fun!

Saturday: We went up to Atlanta on Saturday, originally going to a gun shop one of Brandon's friends wanted to see. Afterwards, we went to DSW for me to exchange shoes I had bought awhile ago. We had lunch there. Then we wanted to go to the Aquarium, but ended up not because the line was massive. That was sad. :( But across the street was the Museum of Patriotism! We went there and got in for way cheap because we're military. It was a pretty good museum. Then we left for the baseball field - we were meeting friends there to watch the Braves vs Dodgers game. That was a great game! After, we were so tired, we went home.

Sunday: Not much today. Errands, cleaning, grocery shopping, and going to the store with the same friend as above to look for a gun safe. Didn't find one we liked, though. I invited the friend over for dinner with us. He stayed for spaghetti and played Wii with us. We also all decided to go to Savannah this upcoming weekend to go to another gun show and spend the weekend there. How fun will that be!

Anyway, I've been super busy. Today, working out and running more errands. Then I need to read some of this moving material to get it all straightened in my head. Have a good day!

Something I found

For the girls who get to kiss their boyfriends before they go to bed... Feel Fortunate.

For the girls who can walk the malls hand in hand with the one they love.. Feel Privileged.

For the girls who get showered with hugs and kisses each day... Feel Glorious.

For the girls that can cry and have the love of your life hold you telling you it'll be okay.. Feel Lucky.

For the girls who have a hard time when their boyfriend goes out of town for the weekend.. Feel Blessed.


For the girls who have no idea what their men are doing during the week... Stay Strong!

For the girls who see the love of their life once every few months due to distance.. Keep Smiling!

For the girls that have to hold their heads up when they haven't heard from their men in weeks.. Stand Tall!

For the girls who race out to the mailbox every day just hoping for a letter... Don't Give Up!

For the girls who have boyfriends that are going to defend their freedom.. Feel Proud!

My first day at Macy's

Today was my first day at Macy's, and even though I was doing training, I thought I'd document it!

I got there early - the store doesn't open until 10am - and since they didn't show me the employee entrance, I had to wait for them to open the store. I was nervous! I went upstairs and the receptionist gave me a tour of the store and introduced me to my manager. She's nice! Everyone I've met at the store is nice.

So I was supposed to be there from 10-6 for my training. I had the basic training and then the Point of Sales training. The basic training took me about an hour and a half, which I heard usually takes 3 hours, so I was ahead. It was an introduction to Macy's, their brands, some diversity and safety training - the usual. Anyway, afterwards I started on the POS training. That one supposed takes 3 to 3.5 hours. I was finished by 3, so about 2 and a half hours with a few little breaks.

So I finished the training in less than 5 hours, an awesome time by everyone's accounts! The POS training wasn't hard but it was a lot of different things. I feel like I'll learn more once I'm actually working. I didn't eat my lunch and only had a few snacks, which drained me too much. Now I feel too blah to do anything but lay on the couch!

So my next work day is Wednesday, and I'm actually on the floor then. And then I work a lot after that! I'm just saving up my 10% of every paycheck to buy myself something nice... like a puppy and Wii Fit :P (Ok, no puppy until Hawaii, but I do need to save up to get one!)

Anyway... I'm not going to tennis lessons tonight. I'm tired. I'll write Brandon his letter, maybe a longer one, and call it an easy night! Brandon passed his PT test - I only know this because I didn't get a phone call from him! So, so far so good. He was nervous about the PT test for some reason, I knew he could do it! I hope I get a letter from him soon!

Weigh In and Ranger School

June 5: 133.8
June 12: 131.6
June 22: 134.4
June 26: 133.2
July 3: 132.4
July 10: 134.0
July 17: 135.0

July 24: 134.4

Brandon left this morning. I dropped him off at the Ranger Training Brigade at 10:30am. He had nearly 150 pounds of equipment to bring with him! This morning we shaved his head (it's all prickly now!) and ate some breakfast, then we left. We got lost for a bit but finally found where we needed to be.

Of course, he's only be gone for a couple hours, so I haven't been bothered by it yet. I get to see him on August 14, so less than 3 weeks. That's an easy time to complete! After that we'll be apart for longer... but he'll be home before I know it, I hope.

I worry about him physically - I just hope his back and feet can handle all the rucking and movement. But he's stronger than we can all imagine, so I know he can do well. I'm just waiting for his first letter to come! Soon enough!

I got a job!

So I know I wasn't going to get a job this summer - I was taking a break, figuring things out, enjoying myself. Well, since Brandon leaves on Sunday and will be gone for 9 weeks, I needed something to keep me busy, right? I figured that first week I'd be fine, I would be busy. Then it would start to wear on me. It's not like I have a huge home to take care of, or babies, or even pets, to keep me busy. So I decided to apply for jobs!

I applied at Macy's on Thursday, got an email basically that night from them to schedule an appointment for an interview, and the had the interview on Tuesday.

The interview started as a group interview. There were 7 of us in a room sitting in a U-shape table formation. The two interviewers were at the front. It was rather quick. They had us introduce ourselves, explain why we wanted to work at Macy's, and then handed out cards with different words and explain what they meant. I got "Respect." I didn't think I did so well at the group interview because at the end they asked us if we had any questions. Of course, I couldn't think of any. I finally scrounged one up and asked about how schedules worked.

At the end the reception came to all of us in the hall and said she had to ask for some to stay behind to finish paperwork. That means that those who she didn't name didn't get the job, fairly easy to tell. I got all sad for a second. Then she named my name! It was funny, there was another "Shantal" there, so when she said Chantal, I thought it was the other girl! Until she said "Chantal.... S?" and I knew it was me. So there were 4 of us named from that session.

We waited in another area and then got called in individually to interview with the HR Manager. She was really nice and easy to talk to. Then she offered me the job right there on the spot for Fine Jewelry! I was amazed. I had to go back later with my Social Security Card and to fill out paperwork, which I did.

I start my official training on Monday! I'm very excited to have something to keep me busy while also making a bit of money. We agreed that 10% of my check is mine to do what I want with. The rest goes to paying off my student loans. I need to buy some black clothes for work now, and then I want to buy some dress clothes for the future. Then I want Wii Fit or Wii Active... and then I'm saving up for my puppy!!